Effective framework to resolve conflict in the Workplace

 Conflicts are a part of our daily lives and are often unavoidable at work. Therefore, it's essential to have the tools to effectively manage conflicts and leverage them to our advantage - to spur new ideas, challenge and strengthen our beliefs, and evolve our perspectives when necessary.

However, conflicts often trigger our fight-or-flight response and can cause chronic stress and mental fatigue and diminish our productivity. Having the right tools can help us face conflicts confidently. 

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Recently, I took a course from Harvard ManageMentor®* to enhance my conflict resolution skills. I summarized the key takeaways from the course in the framework below to help you better prepare for resolving conflicts.

The framework consists of six (6) parts

1. Identify the type of conflict  
2. Identify your own and your counterpart's conflict styles  
3. Determine how you want to address the conflict  
4. Prepare to resolve conflict
5. Execute your plan
6. Mitigation strategy if you cannot resolve the conflict

1. Identify the type of conflict

Conflicts typically fall into four (4) categories: relationship conflicts, task-related conflicts, conflicts caused by clashes between individuals at different status levels, and conflicts arising from disagreements in processes. For example, two team members might have differing views on approving new feature requests. Identifying the type of conflict sets the context for exploring resolution approaches. 

2. Identify your and your counterpart's conflict styles

There are generally two types of conflict styles: Avoider and Seeker. An Avoider's inherent tedency is to avoid conflicts, while a Seeker is more inclined to engage in conflicts. This results in four (4) combinations that will dictate how you approach resolution:

• Avoider/Avoider: If you and your counterpart are Avoiders, you must step outside your comfort zone to initiate the conflict resolution process. Emphasize empathy toward your counterpart while highlighting the importance of resolving the conflict to benefit the project, team, or process.
  
• Avoider/Seeker: When interacting with a Seeker, setting expectations upfront is crucial. Acknowledge that dealing with conflicts is not your natural inclination, but you want to pursue resolution for the greater good. Encourage your counterpart to empathize with your position and recognize the shared goals you both are working toward.  
• Seeker/Avoider: If you are a Seeker dealing with an Avoider, it's important to exercise restraint. Be mindful of your counterpart's tendency to avoid conflict and reinforce your mutual motivation to resolve the issue for the greater good.
• Seeker/Seeker: If you and your counterpart are Seekers, remember to remain calm and lead by example to work towards a resolution.

3. Identify how you want to address the conflict

Once you understand the conflict's background and your counterpart's personality, you need to decide how to approach the resolution. There are primarily three (3) main strategies:

1. Address the conflict directly: This is the most advisable approach as it demonstrates leadership and ensures the conflict is managed directly.
2. Address the conflict Indirectly: This involves seeking assistance from your manager or a colleague to help resolve the conflict indirectly. For example, if you disagree with a colleague, ask your manager to discuss the issue with the other colleague's manager to facilitate resolution.
3. Do Nothing: Not every conflict requires resolution. Although generally not advisable, this approach can be relevant if you deal with a problematic colleague on a short-term project. In such cases, focusing on your deliverables may be more productive rather than spending time and effort trying to resolve the conflict.

4. Prepare to resolve conflict

If you've decided to address the conflict directly, preparation is crucial. Define the goals you want to achieve before approaching your counterpart. Try to empathize with their perspective. While you may not achieve all your goals, be prepared to share your viewpoint and emphasize the importance of resolving the conflict for the team, the project, and yourselves.

5. Execute your plan

This is where the resolution process begins. Remember that resolution requires practice; the more you engage in it, the better you'll become. Keep the following guiding principles in mind when discussing matters with your counterpart:

1. Look for Common Ground: Start with areas you both agree upon.
2. Identify Points of Disagreement: Be direct while delivering your message with empathy.
3. Be Factual: Stick to the facts without emotion clouding your judgment.
4. Learn Rather Than Persuade: Use active listening to understand your counterpart's viewpoint. Be open to adapting your position to find common ground and resolve the diagreement.

6. Mitigation strategy if you cannot resolve the conflict

There may be situations where, despite several attempts, you cannot find common ground. In such cases, it can be helpful to seek help—this might be the appropriate time to involve your manager. Additionally, taking a break during difficult conversations can help reset the situation and remove emotional blocks.

Conflict resolution is challenging, but it is an inevitable part of the modern work environment. Having a proven framework to rely on is essential for finding a path forward. You can become adept at resolving conflicts and extracting value from such encounters with practice.

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* Recommendation for similar courses from Harvard ManageMentor®

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